just diagnosed
Warning: The messages in this forum are the personal views and opinions of individuals. NEVER act on any advice or opinion posted in this forum without FIRST checking with your personal physician! Mood Tracker Web Media, LLC is not obligated to check forum postings for accuracy nor does it endorse the opinions of any person using the forum.
| szany | Posted: March 8, 2010 - 7:17 am | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Total Posts: 42 Joined: 02-02-2010 |
I have suffered since i was only 7yrs and never got a diagnosis till i was about 28 which is a long time. I managed without medication on and off but now am taking some as things were getting a bit too scarey for my liking. I never really thought i suffered mania untill i learnt what it was then it all made sense to me. My dr refuses me any form of anti depressant as he worrys it could make me manic, so im suprised in a way they prescribed u prozac, but drs all work differently. I suggest read and gather as much info as u can there are lots of websites that will come up if u google. I feel like ive been living on a slippery firemans poll to be honest, i struggle up and keep slipping back down the dam thing. Welcome to the forum x  Medications for 1st quarter 2010
|
| iain | Posted: March 8, 2010 - 2:32 pm |
|---|---|
Total Posts: 2 Joined: 02-22-2010 |
I think there are alot of who have gone thru this. I mean depression is easy for us to realize and see ourselves, its impossible to miss your own signs of not wanting to get out of bed, staring at blank walls, the dread, dead feeling not even wanting to eat, shower anything. Probably why most people seek out treatment or brought to treatment during depression or mixed states (unless full blown mania). Unless you suffer a full blown mania episode the hypomania is harder until you look at it retrospect. Probably a reason why *some* people thrive on their hypomania episodes. Myself my hypo "stints" are insanely racing thoughts, feeling so much energy, sounding like a chimpmunk when Im talking so fast, not being able to sleep long without waking up alot and doesnt sound so bad really until you factor inability to focus, to concrete on anything for more then a few minutes. Some people can function when they are mania, some of us cant (like me) so I can see why you'd miss the signs personally. So unless you experience the bad aspects of it its pretty easy to think well Im just hyper or in a good mood today...until 2 weeks later when you crash. For me I think it was absolute terror after being diagnosed to look back at my life and pinpoint every episode. Its amazing how long people can struggle thru things and simply endure them because they dont realize that something is "wrong" that everyone isnt this way or grasp it. Doesnt help either when you get family/friends who's advice "everyone gets down" or "what are you on drugs or too much caffeine". You go thru 25+ years of that and I think you start to try and convince yourself there is nothing wrong and if there is something wrong best to try and hide it as much as you can because of the whole stigma behind it and since no one believes you anyway.  |
| Hope2010 | Posted: March 9, 2010 - 10:56 am |
|---|---|
Total Posts: 4 Joined: 02-18-2010 |
My dr. says that prozac alone is not good for bipolar patients. it can get them really manic. I agree, before I saw a psychiatrist i was seeing a family dr. that presccribed prozac alone. it was the false happiness. I thought I was doing so well, but I spent out of control, I separated from my husband and I am now depressed and i realize the damage I did. Unfortunately we don't think we are doing any worng when we are manic. As a result, prozac should be taken with a stabilizer if you want to control the crazy manic it causes. We all have ups and downs. I work better when i am manic but at the same time I do things i regret later.Good luck!!! |
| Nikki01 | Posted: March 9, 2010 - 1:06 pm |
|---|---|
Total Posts: 266 Joined: 06-10-2009 |
The diagnosis for me sparked a slippery response. Initially relieved (that's what wrong with me) reading all the literature, taking medications, information overload on all things bipolar. The suddenly, I didn't want it anymore. The drs had made a mistake. I was managing quite well by myself thank you very much. So I stopped the meds and continued on, cancelling my service with the drs. Big mood shifts both up and down saw me seek out help again. Then I felt grief, who was I? Where did the bipolar end and me begin? I didn't know myself anymore and it terrified me. I was angry with it, with me, with the drs. I took my meds for a good few months, the drs thought I was making good progress, but inside I felt I needed to challenge it one more time, manage things myself. Plus if I'm honest, I missed the hypomania. I stopped my meds and fell into a terrible, dark low very quickly. On xmas day it took everything I had not to take my own life. I'm not proud of that, I have a wonderful family. I knew I needed help and I need meds. Now I take my meds, try to look after myself, but it still feels like a battle. The key for me has been accepting who I am when I'm baseline. Learning to like what's left when the bipolar is taken away. It is a journey that's for sure. Every ones is different, because every one's bipolar is different. I do wish you all the very best |
| mer5906 | Posted: March 9, 2010 - 8:30 pm | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Total Posts: 8 Joined: 02-28-2010 |
The biggest problem I have with my bipolar diagnosis is accepting that my life is going to be a battle against my brain. I get so tired of fighting sometimes. Recently, a medication that seemed to be working caused a debilitating allergic reaction out of the blue, and before that I had started experiencing a mixed episode for the first time. I've had to take a medical leave of absence from school, and my doctor referred me to a psychologist to help me "learn to take care of myself"-- whatever that means. It's like every time I think I've gone a couple steps forward, I race back to the beginning. And then, I start to wonder whether there is even a point to dealing with the medications: if I'm still going up and down, why waste all of this time (and money)? But I think I know that it isn't safe for me to be off meds. I didn't like who I was before my diagnosis and I like myself better now. There are just so many feelings that a bipolar person has to deal with on a daily basis that other people don't have to confront. I really think it's just all a process. Finding the right meds can take years (as my doctor keeps telling me). So, I guess what I'm saying is you have to find acceptance of your limitations and feelings and patience. Good luck.  Medications for March 2010
|
| marthanj | Posted: March 9, 2010 - 9:18 pm | ||
|---|---|---|---|
Total Posts: 4 Joined: 03-04-2010 |
Thanks soo much everyone the feedback helps. I've always been more down than up. I feel more stable I guess. The hypomania was never strong enough to impede my life...not a big spender just more prolific with my drawing. always been more apathetic than excitable? I am just glad to be doing something  Medications for March 2010
|
| iain | Posted: March 9, 2010 - 9:28 pm |
|---|---|
Total Posts: 2 Joined: 02-22-2010 |
Being down more then up is pretty common for BP II so its basically a common thing in bp. Its good though your hypomania is such that it is actually more positive then negative or that its not full blown mania. |
| ArdentOne | Posted: March 10, 2010 - 12:20 am |
|---|---|
Total Posts: 181 Joined: 02-09-2010 |
I have alot less manic swings now then when I was younger. I am not sure if it's the medications I've been on or whether it's just an evolution of the illness. For a long time I had gotten to a point where I basically identified myself by my diagnosis. That's only been changing in the last year or so. Partially due to a medication change, but mostly due to a change in the way I think. It's really hard to relearn a pattern of behavior that has developed over a life time. Thing is it can be done. It hasn't been an easy road, but I am working with a staff that really has enough hope and will to help me continue to struggle up that mountain. I'm at a crossroads in my life right now and I have some very important choices I need to make that will greatly effect my life. If it were not for support staff I would probably be in a hospital now, because to be fair, the medication alone doesn't cut it. It's the staff challenging my thinking that is helping me the most. And mer5906, I've been fighting this a very long time, and while the process at times seems pointless, there are times where I am stronger and better able to function at a level I am content with. Perhaps not where I could be without the illness, but without the challenge of my mental illness I don't think I would have become the person I am. |
| marthanj | Posted: March 10, 2010 - 5:03 pm | ||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Total Posts: 4 Joined: 03-04-2010 |
I identify with that a lot. I have a creative career I really like and if I didn't have the strong emotions I might not have pursued it so fervently.  Medications for March 2010
|
| marthanj | Posted: March 17, 2010 - 7:30 pm | ||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Total Posts: 4 Joined: 03-04-2010 |
It's astounding to me that I can still feel depressed on prozac. It's rare now and I can work even when I feel down but I can't believe that therapy and drugs aren't really killing my lows completely- maybe this is "normal"?  Medications for March 2010
|
Joined: 03-04-2010