Should I go back to the Doctor?
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February 13, 2012 - 9:44 pm
Hey guys, I'm new on this site but I recently read about "soft bipolar" and i almost cried at how much it sounded like me.
When I was very young.... starting like age 6 or 7.. i was always soooo anxious... so much that I would get severe stomach pain that made me crawl under tables, curl into a little ball, and cry for hours. By the time I was out of high school, I was suffering severe anxiety and stress so when I was about 20 my doctor actually took me out of work for 2 months and put me on anti depressants. They helped a lot at the time. I've had to switch kinds like 4 times tho because a lot of them were giving me really horrible night terrors. Now I'm on Effexor... BUT the past 6 months have been really hard for me. My moods are just ALL OVER the place. I can be soooo happy one moment but really hyper... like almost out of my body kinda hyper, the next thing, someone drives too slow or looks at me weird, and i'm so mad that I'm actually shaking uncontrollably. Sometimes for no reason I get a fit of anger and i feel like the only way to get the energy out of my body is to hit something like a wall. I even took to biting my arm to get the tension out of my body....! I feel like I'm losing my mind. Then there's the other end where I'm so sad I just wanna sleep and i want everyone to leave me alone. It's been like this for a consistent week or so now.... (it happens a lot but its really bad this time) I'm soo sad and hopeless all the time and feel like such a failure. But then also i sometimes have mixed days where im over joyous one moment, and crying the next. Its scaring the heck outta my mom and me. :( I just dont know what to do. I've also taken to my old habits of restricting food again.... which Im sure isnt helping my mood but still.... i just dont know what to do. I'm scared to go to the doctor cuz I dont even know what to say to them. Help me someone please before i lose my mind.
When I was very young.... starting like age 6 or 7.. i was always soooo anxious... so much that I would get severe stomach pain that made me crawl under tables, curl into a little ball, and cry for hours. By the time I was out of high school, I was suffering severe anxiety and stress so when I was about 20 my doctor actually took me out of work for 2 months and put me on anti depressants. They helped a lot at the time. I've had to switch kinds like 4 times tho because a lot of them were giving me really horrible night terrors. Now I'm on Effexor... BUT the past 6 months have been really hard for me. My moods are just ALL OVER the place. I can be soooo happy one moment but really hyper... like almost out of my body kinda hyper, the next thing, someone drives too slow or looks at me weird, and i'm so mad that I'm actually shaking uncontrollably. Sometimes for no reason I get a fit of anger and i feel like the only way to get the energy out of my body is to hit something like a wall. I even took to biting my arm to get the tension out of my body....! I feel like I'm losing my mind. Then there's the other end where I'm so sad I just wanna sleep and i want everyone to leave me alone. It's been like this for a consistent week or so now.... (it happens a lot but its really bad this time) I'm soo sad and hopeless all the time and feel like such a failure. But then also i sometimes have mixed days where im over joyous one moment, and crying the next. Its scaring the heck outta my mom and me. :( I just dont know what to do. I've also taken to my old habits of restricting food again.... which Im sure isnt helping my mood but still.... i just dont know what to do. I'm scared to go to the doctor cuz I dont even know what to say to them. Help me someone please before i lose my mind.
xoxo, Jennifer
Hey guys, I'm new on this site but I recently read about "soft bipolar" and i almost cried at how much it sounded like me.
When I was very young.... starting like age 6 or 7.. i was always soooo anxious... so much that I would get severe stomach pain that made me crawl under tables, curl into a little ball, and cry for hours. By the time I was out of high school, I was suffering severe anxiety and stress so when I was about 20 my doctor actually took me out of work for 2 months and put me on anti depressants. They helped a lot at the time. I've had to switch kinds like 4 times tho because a lot of them were giving me really horrible night terrors. Now I'm on Effexor... BUT the past 6 months have been really hard for me. My moods are just ALL OVER the place. I can be soooo happy one moment but really hyper... like almost out of my body kinda hyper, the next thing, someone drives too slow or looks at me weird, and i'm so mad that I'm actually shaking uncontrollably. Sometimes for no reason I get a fit of anger and i feel like the only way to get the energy out of my body is to hit something like a wall. I even took to biting my arm to get the tension out of my body....! I feel like I'm losing my mind. Then there's the other end where I'm so sad I just wanna sleep and i want everyone to leave me alone. It's been like this for a consistent week or so now.... (it happens a lot but its really bad this time) I'm soo sad and hopeless all the time and feel like such a failure. But then also i sometimes have mixed days where im over joyous one moment, and crying the next. Its scaring the heck outta my mom and me. :( I just dont know what to do. I've also taken to my old habits of restricting food again.... which Im sure isnt helping my mood but still.... i just dont know what to do. I'm scared to go to the doctor cuz I dont even know what to say to them. Help me someone please before i lose my mind.
When I was very young.... starting like age 6 or 7.. i was always soooo anxious... so much that I would get severe stomach pain that made me crawl under tables, curl into a little ball, and cry for hours. By the time I was out of high school, I was suffering severe anxiety and stress so when I was about 20 my doctor actually took me out of work for 2 months and put me on anti depressants. They helped a lot at the time. I've had to switch kinds like 4 times tho because a lot of them were giving me really horrible night terrors. Now I'm on Effexor... BUT the past 6 months have been really hard for me. My moods are just ALL OVER the place. I can be soooo happy one moment but really hyper... like almost out of my body kinda hyper, the next thing, someone drives too slow or looks at me weird, and i'm so mad that I'm actually shaking uncontrollably. Sometimes for no reason I get a fit of anger and i feel like the only way to get the energy out of my body is to hit something like a wall. I even took to biting my arm to get the tension out of my body....! I feel like I'm losing my mind. Then there's the other end where I'm so sad I just wanna sleep and i want everyone to leave me alone. It's been like this for a consistent week or so now.... (it happens a lot but its really bad this time) I'm soo sad and hopeless all the time and feel like such a failure. But then also i sometimes have mixed days where im over joyous one moment, and crying the next. Its scaring the heck outta my mom and me. :( I just dont know what to do. I've also taken to my old habits of restricting food again.... which Im sure isnt helping my mood but still.... i just dont know what to do. I'm scared to go to the doctor cuz I dont even know what to say to them. Help me someone please before i lose my mind.
xoxo, Jennifer
February 15, 2012 - 6:58 am
Total Posts: 124
Joined: 07-25-2009
Joined: 07-25-2009
if you've been using the moodtracker graph for a while i would print it out and take it with you to the doctors, you may get some answers, esp since the anti depressants are giving you side effects.
Blame it on the black star.
I am not here to decorate your world, only my own.
if you've been using the moodtracker graph for a while i would print it out and take it with you to the doctors, you may get some answers, esp since the anti depressants are giving you side effects.
Blame it on the black star.
I am not here to decorate your world, only my own.
March 31, 2012 - 1:09 pm
Total Posts: 7
Joined: 11-26-2011
Joined: 11-26-2011
hey JennDancer,
You sound fairly similar to me. I swing from extreme anxiety/anger/irritation to relatively nomal, to mild/moderate depression. I do have hyper moments from time to time, but they are a lot less now than they used to be. I acctually miss those times, because I was never dangerous to myself or others or stupid - just really happy and silly sense of humor. Even the biting your arm thing sounds like me - only I punch or slap myself, sometimes until I bruise. I haven't been on anti-depressents yet - I am waiting for my psych refferal. But I am really reserved about it for fear it could make my anxiety worse. I feel like I am not quite bi-polar, not quite depression. Even cyclothymia doesn't sound quite enough like me. Its like I have depression that is just barely on the out skirts the bi-polar spectrum. Its so frustrating to not fit into any category - especially for the sake of getting practical treatement. I agree with the above poster - take you charts to the doctor and be very clear about the shifts in mood you are expeiencing. Best of luck!
You sound fairly similar to me. I swing from extreme anxiety/anger/irritation to relatively nomal, to mild/moderate depression. I do have hyper moments from time to time, but they are a lot less now than they used to be. I acctually miss those times, because I was never dangerous to myself or others or stupid - just really happy and silly sense of humor. Even the biting your arm thing sounds like me - only I punch or slap myself, sometimes until I bruise. I haven't been on anti-depressents yet - I am waiting for my psych refferal. But I am really reserved about it for fear it could make my anxiety worse. I feel like I am not quite bi-polar, not quite depression. Even cyclothymia doesn't sound quite enough like me. Its like I have depression that is just barely on the out skirts the bi-polar spectrum. Its so frustrating to not fit into any category - especially for the sake of getting practical treatement. I agree with the above poster - take you charts to the doctor and be very clear about the shifts in mood you are expeiencing. Best of luck!
hey JennDancer,
You sound fairly similar to me. I swing from extreme anxiety/anger/irritation to relatively nomal, to mild/moderate depression. I do have hyper moments from time to time, but they are a lot less now than they used to be. I acctually miss those times, because I was never dangerous to myself or others or stupid - just really happy and silly sense of humor. Even the biting your arm thing sounds like me - only I punch or slap myself, sometimes until I bruise. I haven't been on anti-depressents yet - I am waiting for my psych refferal. But I am really reserved about it for fear it could make my anxiety worse. I feel like I am not quite bi-polar, not quite depression. Even cyclothymia doesn't sound quite enough like me. Its like I have depression that is just barely on the out skirts the bi-polar spectrum. Its so frustrating to not fit into any category - especially for the sake of getting practical treatement. I agree with the above poster - take you charts to the doctor and be very clear about the shifts in mood you are expeiencing. Best of luck!
You sound fairly similar to me. I swing from extreme anxiety/anger/irritation to relatively nomal, to mild/moderate depression. I do have hyper moments from time to time, but they are a lot less now than they used to be. I acctually miss those times, because I was never dangerous to myself or others or stupid - just really happy and silly sense of humor. Even the biting your arm thing sounds like me - only I punch or slap myself, sometimes until I bruise. I haven't been on anti-depressents yet - I am waiting for my psych refferal. But I am really reserved about it for fear it could make my anxiety worse. I feel like I am not quite bi-polar, not quite depression. Even cyclothymia doesn't sound quite enough like me. Its like I have depression that is just barely on the out skirts the bi-polar spectrum. Its so frustrating to not fit into any category - especially for the sake of getting practical treatement. I agree with the above poster - take you charts to the doctor and be very clear about the shifts in mood you are expeiencing. Best of luck!
Joined: 02-13-2012