Slipping back
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July 23, 2015 - 7:59 am
It's summer break. I'm supposed to be happy, relaxed, to hang out with my friends and only doing stuff that makes me feel good, but I'm not. Although for a while now I've been feeling better, and I even made some new friends, now it feels like everything's becoming just like it used to be. This new friends don't really talk with me anymore. My old ones aren't in contact with me anymore either, and I have to admit that a big part in that. But yet, I'd expect at least one of them, that knows about my depression, to ask me how I'm doing. Her not asking me even once since this break started how I was doing just porves everything I've been to afraid to admit so far- that she's not a real friend. That I have no one I can trust, no I can rely on. That no one cares for me. No one to save me from myself when I slip back into a depression episode. I'm feeling myself going through everything all over again, and I'm not ready to do this again. There's no way I'll survive another episode pf this. Last time I was so close to commiting suicide, why wouldn't I this time?
It's summer break. I'm supposed to be happy, relaxed, to hang out with my friends and only doing stuff that makes me feel good, but I'm not. Although for a while now I've been feeling better, and I even made some new friends, now it feels like everything's becoming just like it used to be. This new friends don't really talk with me anymore. My old ones aren't in contact with me anymore either, and I have to admit that a big part in that. But yet, I'd expect at least one of them, that knows about my depression, to ask me how I'm doing. Her not asking me even once since this break started how I was doing just porves everything I've been to afraid to admit so far- that she's not a real friend. That I have no one I can trust, no I can rely on. That no one cares for me. No one to save me from myself when I slip back into a depression episode. I'm feeling myself going through everything all over again, and I'm not ready to do this again. There's no way I'll survive another episode pf this. Last time I was so close to commiting suicide, why wouldn't I this time?
July 26, 2015 - 4:51 pm
Total Posts: 868
Joined: 06-12-2011
Joined: 06-12-2011
Shani,
Am I correct in assuming you are a young person? High school or college? You might not have had many changes in friendships. It took me many years and advice from a therapist to figure out that people drift in and out of your life, and that is ok. I always just figured my friends didn't like me because they moved on. But that really wasn't true. It is just that people and circumstances change. I went through several sets of friends in high school. I only keep in touch with one.
As for the lack of support with depression, please know that a mental illness is a lot for adults to handle, let alone young people. As a general rule, people like to surround themselves with positive people. If you wear a frown, they will be less likely to want to hang out. One solution is to find a support group for people with depression or bipolar disorder. Have you heard of NAMI? They gave groups that meet for free, and even have groups fir teens if that would be appropriate for you. There you can find people that you can share your depression with without judgement.
In addition, you might benefit from meeting with a therapist. They can help you put things into perspective.
Of course, you always have this forum. NAMI has a more active depression forum than this one so check that out too.
Don't be too hard on youself or your friends. And don't think that you should be or have to be happy just because it is summer break. It is normal to be down now and then.
Keep in touch.
Am I correct in assuming you are a young person? High school or college? You might not have had many changes in friendships. It took me many years and advice from a therapist to figure out that people drift in and out of your life, and that is ok. I always just figured my friends didn't like me because they moved on. But that really wasn't true. It is just that people and circumstances change. I went through several sets of friends in high school. I only keep in touch with one.
As for the lack of support with depression, please know that a mental illness is a lot for adults to handle, let alone young people. As a general rule, people like to surround themselves with positive people. If you wear a frown, they will be less likely to want to hang out. One solution is to find a support group for people with depression or bipolar disorder. Have you heard of NAMI? They gave groups that meet for free, and even have groups fir teens if that would be appropriate for you. There you can find people that you can share your depression with without judgement.
In addition, you might benefit from meeting with a therapist. They can help you put things into perspective.
Of course, you always have this forum. NAMI has a more active depression forum than this one so check that out too.
Don't be too hard on youself or your friends. And don't think that you should be or have to be happy just because it is summer break. It is normal to be down now and then.
Keep in touch.
This being human is a guest house. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all. Treat each guest honorably.
Shani,
Am I correct in assuming you are a young person? High school or college? You might not have had many changes in friendships. It took me many years and advice from a therapist to figure out that people drift in and out of your life, and that is ok. I always just figured my friends didn't like me because they moved on. But that really wasn't true. It is just that people and circumstances change. I went through several sets of friends in high school. I only keep in touch with one.
As for the lack of support with depression, please know that a mental illness is a lot for adults to handle, let alone young people. As a general rule, people like to surround themselves with positive people. If you wear a frown, they will be less likely to want to hang out. One solution is to find a support group for people with depression or bipolar disorder. Have you heard of NAMI? They gave groups that meet for free, and even have groups fir teens if that would be appropriate for you. There you can find people that you can share your depression with without judgement.
In addition, you might benefit from meeting with a therapist. They can help you put things into perspective.
Of course, you always have this forum. NAMI has a more active depression forum than this one so check that out too.
Don't be too hard on youself or your friends. And don't think that you should be or have to be happy just because it is summer break. It is normal to be down now and then.
Keep in touch.
Am I correct in assuming you are a young person? High school or college? You might not have had many changes in friendships. It took me many years and advice from a therapist to figure out that people drift in and out of your life, and that is ok. I always just figured my friends didn't like me because they moved on. But that really wasn't true. It is just that people and circumstances change. I went through several sets of friends in high school. I only keep in touch with one.
As for the lack of support with depression, please know that a mental illness is a lot for adults to handle, let alone young people. As a general rule, people like to surround themselves with positive people. If you wear a frown, they will be less likely to want to hang out. One solution is to find a support group for people with depression or bipolar disorder. Have you heard of NAMI? They gave groups that meet for free, and even have groups fir teens if that would be appropriate for you. There you can find people that you can share your depression with without judgement.
In addition, you might benefit from meeting with a therapist. They can help you put things into perspective.
Of course, you always have this forum. NAMI has a more active depression forum than this one so check that out too.
Don't be too hard on youself or your friends. And don't think that you should be or have to be happy just because it is summer break. It is normal to be down now and then.
Keep in touch.
This being human is a guest house. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all. Treat each guest honorably.
Joined: 07-23-2015