A bad relationship with sleep

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twoo2
November 4, 2012 - 3:05 am
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twoo2
Total Posts: 3
Joined: 11-03-2012
Every night when I get into bed, my first thought is, "Okay, so what is it going to be tonight?" I wonder this because of the bad relationship I have with sleep.

Once the light is out and my head is on the pillow, snippets of conversation loop over and over again, ideas fight to come up to the front, images flutter in and out, sound bites blare, worries, stresses and recollections raise my ire and get my adrenalin pumping. They throw me backwards in time, reliving situations I don't want to relive or throw me forward in a state of planning and plotting. It is a lot to contend with.

I am prescribed 8mg Prazosin at bed time to help with this PTSD symptom but am allowed to take an additional 4mg if needed. I always need it so I just take the full 12mg at bedtime no matter what.

If I can stay put and just sort of suffer through it, tossing and turning all the while, When just doing it this way it usually takes about a full two or three hours to finally fall asleep.

When I finally do fall asleep, because my adrenalin is up from the process of that speading head, my dreams are insane. I yell a lot in my sleep, talk a lot in my sleep, grab for things that aren't there. I guess I am in full fight or flight mode.

Most nights, like tonight, I just give up and get out of bed, sit in the living room and smoke for hours on end until I am exhausted enough that my body will demand sleep over my head's insistence to keep me awake with noise. Sometimes, though, even total physical exhaustion won't work and I just never get back into bed, maybe crashing later the next day late in the afternoon.

I have become so sick of this lately that I have escalated the intake of my other meds to almost triple the prescribed dosage (I have not shared this with my pdoc). So just to get some rest I have started taking 3000mg Valproic Acid instead of 1000mg at bed time and 12mg Thiothixine instead of the normal 4mg.

I'm posting all this because I am wondering what medication, if any, others have taken that just give them some regular, uninterrupted, baseline sleep that they can rely on. Taking triple my anti-psychotic and mood stabilizer can't be good for my liver and is really bad on my wallet.

I'm just so stubborn. I think I should be able to manage this myself, but I am at a total loss.

What works for you all? How should I start a conversation with my pdoc about needing something more to help me sleep without looking like I am drug seeking (I am newly in recovery for drug/alcohol dependence and he know it therefore he has already stated he would not write a script for benzos).

Hoping to hear from some folks. Sorry for the long post, but I had to get all that out.

Take care :-)

T


Today I am ready to grow.
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twoo2
twoo2
November 4, 2012 - 3:05 am
Every night when I get into bed, my first thought is, "Okay, so what is it going to be tonight?" I wonder this because of the bad relationship I have with sleep.

Once the light is out and my head is on the pillow, snippets of conversation loop over and over again, ideas fight to come up to the front, images flutter in and out, sound bites blare, worries, stresses and recollections raise my ire and get my adrenalin pumping. They throw me backwards in time, reliving situations I don't want to relive or throw me forward in a state of planning and plotting. It is a lot to contend with.

I am prescribed 8mg Prazosin at bed time to help with this PTSD symptom but am allowed to take an additional 4mg if needed. I always need it so I just take the full 12mg at bedtime no matter what.

If I can stay put and just sort of suffer through it, tossing and turning all the while, When just doing it this way it usually takes about a full two or three hours to finally fall asleep.

When I finally do fall asleep, because my adrenalin is up from the process of that speading head, my dreams are insane. I yell a lot in my sleep, talk a lot in my sleep, grab for things that aren't there. I guess I am in full fight or flight mode.

Most nights, like tonight, I just give up and get out of bed, sit in the living room and smoke for hours on end until I am exhausted enough that my body will demand sleep over my head's insistence to keep me awake with noise. Sometimes, though, even total physical exhaustion won't work and I just never get back into bed, maybe crashing later the next day late in the afternoon.

I have become so sick of this lately that I have escalated the intake of my other meds to almost triple the prescribed dosage (I have not shared this with my pdoc). So just to get some rest I have started taking 3000mg Valproic Acid instead of 1000mg at bed time and 12mg Thiothixine instead of the normal 4mg.

I'm posting all this because I am wondering what medication, if any, others have taken that just give them some regular, uninterrupted, baseline sleep that they can rely on. Taking triple my anti-psychotic and mood stabilizer can't be good for my liver and is really bad on my wallet.

I'm just so stubborn. I think I should be able to manage this myself, but I am at a total loss.

What works for you all? How should I start a conversation with my pdoc about needing something more to help me sleep without looking like I am drug seeking (I am newly in recovery for drug/alcohol dependence and he know it therefore he has already stated he would not write a script for benzos).

Hoping to hear from some folks. Sorry for the long post, but I had to get all that out.

Take care :-)

T


Today I am ready to grow.
hrindlis
November 4, 2012 - 7:33 pm
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hrindlis
Total Posts: 2
Joined: 08-01-2010
Know how that goes. I dread sleep, even as I crave it. I despise the dreams...literally can't remember the last time I slept without vivid dreams. The "good" dreams border on disturbing, the "bad" ones truly horrific. I have also tried the Prasosin & see no difference whatsoever when I am on it. Agreed that if you value your liver (and who doesn't?) upping existing meds isn't a good long range plan. Nor is it likely to continue to go unnoticed by your pdoc for long.

Have you tried the general sleep meds--Ambien, Lunesta, etc? Also melatonin (the sublingual liquid form works best for me). Most of the general meds just made my nightmares worse unfortunately...the hallucinations on Ambien were really fun. Maybe ask about Seroquel as an option for an antipsych? It's supposedly super sedating in higher doses, though I take a baby dose & it doesn't seem to do much of anything sleep wise.



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hrindlis
hrindlis
November 4, 2012 - 7:33 pm
Know how that goes. I dread sleep, even as I crave it. I despise the dreams...literally can't remember the last time I slept without vivid dreams. The "good" dreams border on disturbing, the "bad" ones truly horrific. I have also tried the Prasosin & see no difference whatsoever when I am on it. Agreed that if you value your liver (and who doesn't?) upping existing meds isn't a good long range plan. Nor is it likely to continue to go unnoticed by your pdoc for long.

Have you tried the general sleep meds--Ambien, Lunesta, etc? Also melatonin (the sublingual liquid form works best for me). Most of the general meds just made my nightmares worse unfortunately...the hallucinations on Ambien were really fun. Maybe ask about Seroquel as an option for an antipsych? It's supposedly super sedating in higher doses, though I take a baby dose & it doesn't seem to do much of anything sleep wise.



twoo2
November 5, 2012 - 3:09 pm
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twoo2
Total Posts: 3
Joined: 11-03-2012
Thanks for the respomse. I am really sorry you suffer from this too, but it is nice to know I am not alone none the less. I have an appt. with my pdoc tomorrow and I am going to tell him everything. I withhold a lot for fear I am going to be told to just deal with it. But that technique really isn't serving me well in the end. We will see what happens. Hang in there!

T :-)


Today I am ready to grow.
Spam? Offensive?
twoo2
twoo2
November 5, 2012 - 3:09 pm
Thanks for the respomse. I am really sorry you suffer from this too, but it is nice to know I am not alone none the less. I have an appt. with my pdoc tomorrow and I am going to tell him everything. I withhold a lot for fear I am going to be told to just deal with it. But that technique really isn't serving me well in the end. We will see what happens. Hang in there!

T :-)


Today I am ready to grow.
Shalora
December 22, 2012 - 5:15 pm
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Shalora
Total Posts: 11
Joined: 12-21-2012
I would be careful with Ambien. It doesn't help you *stay* asleep, just *fall* asleep, and it can make you hallucinate. It can also cause all kinds of parasomnias - doing stuff while sleeping, basically. People have sex, eat food, go for a drive, all kinds of weird stuff, and have no awareness while they're doing it and no memory of it afterwards.

My doctor put me on it in the summer, and I started having hallucinations pretty much immediately. FREAKED ME OUT.

Once I got an actual diagnosis, my PNP put me on Seroquel and it was the answer for me. Knocked me out despite the racing thoughts, kept me down long enough to actually get the rest I needed, and even mitigated my nightmares. I'd still have 'em, but not nearly as severe of scenarios going on (no more rape dreams, for example), and the emotional effect wasn't as intense when I woke up. It was like there was a cloud or something between me and my dreams - I could tell what they were about, but they were indistinct and "softened".

Do talk to your doctor. If you're worried about seeming to be drug-seeking, just be very clear about your needs. Don't ask for benzos, just explain your symptoms and say you're looking for something to help. There are plenty of non-narcotic options, asking for help with sleep doesn't mean asking for controlled substances. :)


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Shalora
Shalora
December 22, 2012 - 5:15 pm
I would be careful with Ambien. It doesn't help you *stay* asleep, just *fall* asleep, and it can make you hallucinate. It can also cause all kinds of parasomnias - doing stuff while sleeping, basically. People have sex, eat food, go for a drive, all kinds of weird stuff, and have no awareness while they're doing it and no memory of it afterwards.

My doctor put me on it in the summer, and I started having hallucinations pretty much immediately. FREAKED ME OUT.

Once I got an actual diagnosis, my PNP put me on Seroquel and it was the answer for me. Knocked me out despite the racing thoughts, kept me down long enough to actually get the rest I needed, and even mitigated my nightmares. I'd still have 'em, but not nearly as severe of scenarios going on (no more rape dreams, for example), and the emotional effect wasn't as intense when I woke up. It was like there was a cloud or something between me and my dreams - I could tell what they were about, but they were indistinct and "softened".

Do talk to your doctor. If you're worried about seeming to be drug-seeking, just be very clear about your needs. Don't ask for benzos, just explain your symptoms and say you're looking for something to help. There are plenty of non-narcotic options, asking for help with sleep doesn't mean asking for controlled substances. :)


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