Tomorrow is my first 'proper' visit to my new pdoc after the old one retired.
I say proper cause I've seen him befoer when work asked for a medical report, there he took all my history and so on but really it's just like starting again.
I'm worried for two reasons, firstly I can only really describe how I am now, he has no way of knowing how debilitating the condition was before I was medicated.
Second when I last saw him for the medical report he said he wanted to review my meds as he thought he could get 'just that little bit more' out of me...!
Now let me point something out to you here. Before being on my current medication I was either on a hight persueing my latest whim fully concentrated on it to the exclusion of everything else, or a blubbering mess who couldn't see the point in life and didn't want to carry on. That is until my ex left me and I became all-in-one perfectly suicidal and hyperactive in one go (my first mixed state) at which point i needed crisis intervention. At this point I couldn't look after myself or my children and had to live with my mom for a while.
After being medicated within a year I rebuilt my life, got a job as an investment analyst and now I'm living an almost normal life, bar my eccentricities and odd bad days.
I put this down to being on just the right meds. So rightly so I'm very protective of them, I'd hate to loose everything.
So I am scared of him changing my meds. I know he wants to change my Cymbalta and seroquel and up my depakote. Upping the depakote is fine but what on earth could he be changing my others for....I hope it's not lithium....
Current medications as of 01-12-2009
05-27-2008 - Present: |
Depakote, 250 mg. Twice a day |
05-27-2008 - Present: |
Seroquel, 50 mg. Once a day at night |
07-12-2008 - Present: |
Duloxetine, 60 mg. Once a day in morning |
-----------
It's just not as easy as pulling yourself together nor does 'everyone has mood swings' come close.
Joined: 05-21-2008