Cycling rate? (comorbid w/BPD and others)

Hello, brand new user here. I've been using a different forum site that encompasses mental health in general for awhile, and heard something there about online mood trackers. So I did a search, and found this place.

My official record is actually Bipolar 1 with Asperger Syndrome and ADHD. I don't have a professional diagnosis of BPD, but identify strongly with its characteristics and suspect I have it. As I understand (correct me if I make a false or innacurate statement), it's not always inherited, but often develops somewhat later on in life in the childhood years through adolescence. I'm 19 years old, 20 in about 2 months, so I believe I've developed it within just the past few years.

So, about cycling. I find that my moods are never consistent throughout the day. For one, I get the BPD-related anger pretty much daily, sometimes as an excessive response to little things, but more often spontaneously. I do my best to keep it under control, and usually manage to do so without creating a scene. Now, as for Bipolar related mood swings, I'm confused. I go through these times, typically lasting a couple of weeks or so, where I slip into serious depression late in the day, and have had suicidal thoughts a lot. It may also be worth mentioning that I'm highly convinced I have Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome. I cannot fall asleep quickly no matter what, I've been relying on 5 mg tablets of Melatonin every night to be able to fall asleep in 1 - 2 hours as opposed to around 4, or sometimes even surpassing 5 hours without it.

During these states of nighttime depression though, I don't feel a whole lot different through the day time. Probably a bit more on the depressive side, but not heavily. I also experience episodes that I believe to be hypomania at unpredictable times, but only lasting a number of hours. I can't readily distinguish between hypomania and full-blown mania, but I've experienced very infrequent and also short-lived periods that seem to be mania, in which I speak quickly and hastily and can't sit still.

I'm just looking for some clues in the puzzle; if anyone has input to offer, please do.

Update

I don't experience full manic episodes, nevermind what I said about that. I've had a look around on the web and figured out the real difference - psychotic symptoms. I don't have that, just states of elevated mood that don't really interfere with my daily life. In other words, hypomania.

Due to this, I'm honestly reconsidering the diagnosis. I'm thinking Bipolar 2 instead of 1.

The question I originally asked was unclear, and I'm actually not surprised I haven't had a response yet. I guess what I really want to know if anyone has similar difficulties. Can anyone relate to the depression that lingers mildly through the day, and then drops off steeply in the later evening? I don't feel affected by the seasons, in fact, I actually prefer the cold months over hot, though mild is best.

Are you seeing a therapist, doctor, etc? It seems like you are doing a lot of research to figure out what's going on. But then you said you had taken meds and now don't want to. I used to have inconsistent moods throughout the day, never figured out what to do about them, caved when my doctor wrote a prescription and told me to think about taking it. Maybe cognitive therapy might be useful in lieu of meds? For sleep (and depression), I take Seroquel about an hour before I want to sleep and it works very well. Maybe ask your doctor about something non-med that could work similarly? I was working with a bunch of 1st graders this morning, so I may have brain drain and be WAY off base. Just throwing some ideas out there. Anyone else?

I mean, BP-nos or cyclothymia might be possible considering your cycling rate? That's just a thought to put forth with your doctor though, especially if you think your bipolar 1 diagnosis is wrong.

And as far as the relating to how you cycle, I kind of can. However, I've been on the manic side of things for a good couple months now and it's a little different and less consistent. But, I cycle within cycles? Like, I've been in a manic/hypomanic episode since about mid- to late November (I've been medicated almost a month after going into therapy babbling like a madman and almost getting caught shoplifting and not sleeping more than 3.5 hours for weeks), but I've had periods of depression as short as maybe half an hour to an hour? I've also had mixed features that have lasted longer than that (up to a couple days), but I always go back to this elevated sort of place where I think it's great fun to try and set things on fire in my room and cut shapes into my skin because it "looks cute" or binge eating out of nowhere "because I feel like it" or going on online shopping sprees. You get the point. I'm just kind of waiting to crash in the spring at this point.