My sleep (or lack of) is getting worse

I only slept in total about 3 hours last night. I feel so drained. it certainly isn't any good for my mood, energy level, symptoms, etc. I know you all have similar issues...i just need a little TLC! I see my new psych doc tomorrow so I'll see what she can do to help me. I just don't want meds that make me drowsy. I REALLY hate that.

So I have continued to have issues of only sleeping a few hours with alternating sleeping 8-9 hrs every other day it seems like. I have only slept 3 hrs again tonight and I work swing shift until 11 pm. I feel like I want to scream. The thing is I really want to sleep. I'm not hypomanic and don't want to get there either.... I'm gonna try to lay back down AGAIN.

Even though I take seraquel, which does work, I seem to not be able to sleep 1night outta 3. I crash pretty hard on that 1nite. It used to be much worse....part of it is that I have trouble taking my seraquel @ the same time every night. Then I feel really lame when I sleep for 11 to 15 hours & completely waste a whole day. I'm lucky I don't have a job or my own family right now bc I wouldn't be very reliable

SUCKS to not be able to sleep period - I'm getting better @ it & hope to have it down before I go back to get another degree in 2mos

I really hope you can relax & @ least rest your body if not your mind so that you can have a good shift @ work either way

REST easy & GOOD nite

lunaefay, I know exactly what you mean about this sucky sleep pattern. I have not slept all night, & I am so tired, yesterday I was so full of energy. I have a feeling today is going to be rough. Hopefully I'll get a nap or two in. Here's you a *HUG* and some *TLC* that's what I need and everybody on here probably does too. I know it's rough to have to swing shifs with no sleep.Try to hang in there and maybe one day you'll get the right help and your medications right. Good luck and have a nice day.

Today was a rough day without much sleep. I feel like crap. But I just started this program online through my HMO that is CBT for sleep. So far I have done the 7 days of the sleep dairy and now I am starting tonight with the specific time i need to go to bed and a specific time I need to wake up. If I wake up in the middle of my sleep I need to get up and do something calming then go back to bed. The problem I will have to overcome is I live in a studio apartment and there isn't much room to "go somewhere else" when I wake up! My futon is on the floor and I sit on it a lot with my laptop on the night stand. Oh geez! I figure something out if it kills me! lol

Lunaefay

lunaefay, I hope this works well for you. I've never lived in a studio apartment, I have only seen them in movies. I always thought they looked neet and had a lot of room, well I now know I was wrong. I live in a mobile home, so I'll just keep it, and it's paid for too. Sorry you don't have much room so you can move around to somewhere else. I don't have a laptop, I love my PC Computer, so I come to my back room to use it. I play a lot of games on it, I also have like a music studio hooked up to it now,, so I get to sing in my microphone, it's close to going Karaokeing, it's not as much fun by myself but at least I practice so when I feel like it and go out to Karaoke, I sound better. I just miss getting to drink, that would always take the edge off & not be so scared. The more I do it the less I am on being so scared, but I love to sing and it is fun. I know what you mean about sleep making you feel like crap and then having a rough day. It is 4:48am and I took 2 sleeping pills at 10:00, but all they did was make me wide awake. I am so tired, but I can't go to sleep. Do you have any friends that you get to go out with sometime? I don't know your living situation. I also have a porch swing that I'll swing on and that helps calm me. But it don't make me sleepy. I just made a gallon of tea at 4:30am, I live a real exciting life, yeah right. I live by myself, don't have friends anymore, they all flew the coop when my health mental & physical exploded about 8 years ago, someone told me they weren't really friends anyway. So I can't trust people now. I get so lonely, but that's life for me now. I have just got to where I go karaoke every once in a while, but I have to go by myself. Now that's just so much fun, going places by yourself. Do you have any hobbies, like to go anywhere specific? I'm trying to figure out something for you to do, to help you. I can't think clear anymore. My mind goes all over the place. In the hospital they told me to do one thing and stay focused on it before I went to do something else, huh they are stupid and don't know what they are talking about. I would do this if I could, I am usually from one thing to another, I don't do it on purpose though. Do you like to listen to music? That is a big thing for me. Do you have a pet to play with? I'm trying. I can't think of anything else right now. I hope I helped a little. I hope you get some sleep, I'll talk to you later, *HUGS* to you, TLC, and take care.

Thanks for writing! I ACTUALLY slept 8 hours last night! WOW it's amazing! I go back to work today. I work Tuesday thro Saturday so I'm glad I had some sleep for a change. Before work I'm going to an orientation for the different groups the HMO has to offer. This is really scary but I'm going to do it. I took my klonopin so that should help.
Yeah, I have a dog and a cat. My dog is a rough collie like Lassie. She makes me laugh. She's so silly and goofy. She'll be 9 years old this August. My cat is black and white medium to long hair. He just tolerates the dog. He thinks he owns the place. Unfortunately, he's not cuddly at all. He never sits on my lap. ;0(
I hope you can cycle down some and not feel like you're all over the place. Maybe take a short walk if you can. It's terrible not being able to sleep. Oh yes I listen to music a lot. I'm glad you have music in your life. It's a very soothing thing. You're brave to go to karaoke! I could never do that! Thanks for the suggestions. (((hugs)))

I think most if not all BPs do not work on the 24 hour day. I use to only sleep good about one night a week and at least 1 day a week I would sleep for 12 hours or more to catch up on all the sleep I missed.

I spent months training myself to stick to a schedule and have been sleeping more "normal" than I have my entire life. For the first few months I would put a blindfold on 30 minutes before I wanted to fall asleep. I didn't like it at first, but once I got use to it, it was amazing how well it helped.

K

I'm using this program through my hmo online to change my sleep. I notice it is starting to help but boy am I tired while my body is adjusting. I'm so sleepy right now and it 2 pm. I have to go to work in a few minutes. I hope I can stay awake!
I like your idea of the blindfold. I just might try it. Thanks!

Lunaefay

I have been having problems sleeping for a long time. a while back, i was so desperate, that i was having suicidal thoughts, and i finally went to the dr. to get some relief, i didnt tell the dr how i was feelings because i didnt know what would happen, so he treated me for depression, for a few months then later diagnosed me with bipolar, which i knew nothing about. I have had these same symptoms most of my life. just never could talk to anyone about them. i think about death alot, but i know i wont act on it because of my son. i havent gotten any good sleep in a long long time. i have alot of anxiety and irritability i guess from sleep depravation. i am hoping that one day, i will get to a point where its under control and i can stop going up and down , like a roller coaster, i hate roller coasters. i also cut myself when i think about killing myself, its my way of relieving the pain that is making me feel that way. i did that when i was a teenager as well, before i was hospitalized for suicide attempts and drug and alcohol abuse.

mooodyrobin, I am so sorry for all your problems. The problem with mental health is it is too hard for the docs to diagonose us,especially when we have way more than 1 or 2. I can feel for you, my 2 kids are the only things that kept me alive thru the years, now I am 48, and I have 4 grandbabies, with 1 more due in the next few weeks, so that keeps me going pretty much. I have been in the hospital more times than I would like to even think about, they are very scary to me, and the last one in November did even more physical & mental abuse to me. Now I am terrified of them. If they get your meds right and keep you on track with them, change them as needed, then alot of times you will feel better and tell the difference. This site is one of the best things I have found out about, I was only told about it about a month ago. I said someone should have told me years ago. Getting to talk to people that battle some of your same health problems really helps and I think it helps everybody on here. I was like you, I never wanted to talk to no one about what was going on, it took me 40 years to get the help I needed. One of the biggest thing that helps me is I have a great Therapists, if you don't have one try to find one that you like and feel very comfortable with, they will help you. Then maybe you will eventually quit cutting- I don't do this, but I have seen and heard alot about it. Please try to get you some help. This place will help you so much, talking about your problems, someone usually has some kind of idea that will work for you. So go in any of the forums and post all you want, you can also start a new topic. I clicked on contact & asked them how to do this, and they emailed me, so I printed it off because I can't remember stuff. But it really is great. I wish you the best, if you would like to talk just post me, I will be more than glad to talk to you, as alot of people on this site. Keep your chin up, try to think about happy things and try to find things that make you laugh, that will take you along way. I hope I made you feel a little better, *HUG* to you, we all need as many of those as we can get, smile, I care about you, as others do to.

well, there is that other thing we can sometimes get , sleep apnea...such a colorful word for such a colorless issue. my son told me the other night that I was someone who definitely needed to use the cpap...he counted to 35 before I took another breath. just a bit scary. I usually get to sleep ok I just don't always stay asleep. lunesta helps me to sleep through the whole night.
so as we need sleep so badly, its gotta be something to def look into, since the lack of sleep or erratic sleep can trigger mood issues.
well, as I sit here and write, my body is telling me to go to bed. I almost fell out of the chair. I was on a trip til this past Wed. and we got home this Thurs about 230am, I didn't sleep too much today so, I'm on my way. pretty weird when you can write things and then realize that it was so totally incoherent! I gotta go! I probably did not say all the things I meant to, just realize I'll look again tomorrow and fix whatever I messed up or forgot.
patience!
Amy

Hello I am new here and I was just diagnosed with BP about 2 months ago. My Pdoc wondered why no one had seen it before.(I'm 30) I completely understand the short sleep times 3-4 hours or no sleep at all for about 28 hours then I will crash and sleep for 10-12 hours. I also work swing and I love the hours but when I can't sleep it gets rough. I do have sleep apnea and use a CPAP machine and its horrible when I need to sleep and I just lay there listening to the machine and my breathing. (a funny thing.. one of my cats decided something was attacking me and smacked my mask a couple times before I got her off the bed.) I do use a mask and it helps especially when I'm trying to sleep in daylight hours.

I hope things get better for everyone.
Rayne

for the most part lately, i can get between 4 and 7 hours of sleep. i still have my days, but overall, i feel pretty good the last couple of weeks, i had my lamictal increased in june, to 400 mg .. and it seems to be making a difference in my moods, at least the depression is not as common and as bad. I go to my pcp tomorrow, and im asking for a referral to a psychiatrist, so that i can get the proper treatment for this, and be able to tell someone about my moods and thoughts that knows what to do about them. i think my pcp will just be there for my aches and pains after tomorrow.

i am going to ask him for a script for lunesta, we are going on vacation and i cannot be sitting up all night at the resort.

i dont want to go on vacation, but can you imagine the uproar that would cause lol

hey lunaefay, I am so glad you got you some sleep. I hope your orientation goes good, don't be scared you are a strong person and I know you can do it. Hold your head up high and go full speed ahead. Your 2 pets sound so wonderful, they probably get you to laughing at times. I know my dog Lucky can make me laugh sometimes, when people can't. He is so great, and I love him so much. Oh you don't have to worry about me being all over the place right now. I am not manic now,, I have just went crashing head into depression. At least when I am manic I am happy at times and have some fun. But now I'm depressed and I am so low, sad, mad, just all kind of crap. I hate this, I want my old life back, this one really sucks. I also can not get into my music now, but this is how it works for me. Yes you could go karaoke, I will tell you what my karaoke guy tells everyone, this is not about if you can sing, this is all about having fun. And believe me, we have got alot of people to try it, and they usually end up loving it, so then they are hooked. So who knows? maybe one night you will go karaoke, I hope so, it is fun. Hope to hear from you soon, Martha *HUGS*

Lunaefay - I can relate to what you're going through as far as sleep goes. I was diagnosed with Narcolepsy 5 years ago and I've had so much trouble with sleep. Last year I didn't sleep for 3 days and ended up hallucinating. I went to my doctor and he gave me an IV to help me. I've tried all the meds to help me sleep and nothing helped. Finally, a few months ago, my doctor started me on Xyrem. It's kind of weird because sometimes I sleep-walk, but I do get a good night's sleep now. I usually sleep 8 hours. You take the first dose before you go to bed. Before you go to bed, you set your alarm clock for 4 hours later. Then you get up in the middle of the night and take your 2nd dose. I always fall back to sleep right away. As i said, the only problem I have is that I sometimes sleep-walk. The good part is that I have lost a lot of weight since I'm sleeping better. My doctor said that people who don't sleep well can't lose weight easily. I've lost almost 30 lbs!!!! Xyrem is a very controlled drug. But it works! Why not ask your doctor about it?

amyf, don't worry about not getting down on here what you mean too. I mess up so much, I'm a big screw up, but it's ok, I was putting something in the success stories about my new grandson, and my son called and told me I could come to the hospital, so I just stopped where I was at because I had to go. I did even put a period on the end, I just stopped it the middled of a sentence. As soon as I could I went back in,, posted and picked up where I left off. Hey, I was excited, I had to go see my little precious grandson. Sorry I start babbling and can't shut up, Uh, yea you not breathing for 35 I would say that has to be terrifiing. The sleep sucks, when mine goes into the stages where I go days and I just can't sleep at all. But I finally just fall asleep for sheer exhaustion. Why do we have to have so much crap that triggers us in so many different ways? Don't we have enough proglems as it is? I hope you didn't fall out of that chair, you are liable to bust your head on something if you have bad luck like me. You said ya'll were on a trip, did you go on vacation? Was it just for a night or was it a week? Where did you go? I hope you had fun because you deserve fun and happiness. When you write things down does it make you feel better? I have tried and tried to write in a journal, and my therapist wanted me to do that too, but it tears my nerves up and I will start cryin, it makes me so depressed, and it brings back all the bad stuff. But this moodtracker has helped me so much. To finally get to talk to people that really do understand what you're going thru, this place is wonderful. Someone always will help me in some way, even if it is just to check on me. I thank everyone, and I have met a few good friends on here too. I'm sorry but I don't understand alot of stuff, would you please tell me what incoherent means? Then I can understand what you meant, well I hope you're sleep gets straightened out and you stay asleep till the next morning when you do sleep. I will talk to you later. *HUGS* I am sorry it took so long for me to get back to you, it's been and still is pretty rough right now, but it will ease up eventuall. Later, girl and be careful.

Hello Rayne, nice to meet you and welcome to moodtracker. You will find this is one of the best things to help you. If you have questions, want to start a new topic, rant and rave about stuff, cry, etc. We all try to help each other, and it is so wonderful to talk to people that can really understand what you are going thru. Ain't doctors just wonderful? Yeah right, I hate them, they go to college all those years and you think they should know something. We all try to figure out why it takes them so many years to diagnois us with this BP crap. Then you have all the different meds, it's like they use us for guinea pigs, trying us on so many. My name is Martha and I am 48. I know, the sleep sucks. I'm so sorry that you have to use one of those machines, my sister-in-law has to use one too. I'm glad that the mask does help you. That's funny what your cat did, and thank you - I've had a really bad day and I needed a laugh. Hollar if you need me I am here to listen and do my best to help. I hope to hear from you soon. *HUGS*

hey immoody2010, I'm glad you are feeling pretty good for now, I hope it keeps lasting for you. I wonder if my lamictal would work the same for me as it has you, I know all of us are different though. I am glad you finally made the decision to get a psychiatris, it will work so much better for you. Have you considered going to a therapist? for someone to listen about all your thoughts? Mine is great, if it wasn't for her I would have killed myself a long time ago. Where are you going to on vacation? I seen where you put resort. I know you don't want to go, so can I go in your place? I really need one but I can't afford it. Well, I hope you have some fun and I hope you get some good sleep too. *HUGS* Hope to hear from you soon, Martha

We are in florida now on vacation. its just tuesday, still got till sat here. im hanging out at the resort while the guys go to the parks, it would be a waste for me to go i dont ride anything. neither does hubby but 1 of us had to go. so i go to the pool everyday and get my exercise, i had lost 20 lbs b4 we came here i dont wanna gain em back sitting around. a therapist? cant i tell a psychiatrist how im feeling? what is the difference. i had a psychiatrist when i was a teen ager, or maybe it was a therapist, they prescribed me meds which ever it was.

A psychiatrist (pdoc) usually only spends about 15 minutes per session with you and mostly just to make med adjustments or for yearly checkups. A therapist (tdoc) talks with you for about an hour and helps you with coping skills as well and gives a report to the pdoc. Usually you can see the tdoc weekly or at least monthly.

hey immoody2010, *HUGS* to hold you over until you get back. When you get back tell me about going to a resort, what it looks like, how and what kind of beds they have in them, well just everything about a resort. I know you don't want to be there but Saturday will be here before you know it, then you'll be back home, I've seen resorts in movies and they look so beautiful. I always wanted to go to one. But there is no way that I will ever get to go to one, I can't afford something like that. It must be nice to loose 20 pounds, I can't loose any. Honey, a psychiatris just does your meds and writes your prescriptions and your refills, my last one I had - I was only in there with him for about 5 minutes, he sucked. The therapist is where you get to talk about your feelings, any thing you have gone thru, what you have problems with,etc. I hope you get one like I have, she is great. I have been seeing her for 8 years, she has brought me so far. I asked her if I would have to come to her forever and she said I have 40 years of all kinds of abuse and other bad stuff in my life, so I will be going for a very long time. She is what has kept me alive since I have been seeing her. I am with her a hour every week. A lot of people do not have to go every week, it depends on what all you have to deal with and what all kind of troubles you have. I hope you find a great one. Hollar at me when you get back and be careful. Love ya, Martha