A wonderful day today.

I make the most of great days and today is one of them so..

I am in Australia in the Wide Bay area and we are having beautiful weather today. We are usually so hot and now that we are heading into Winter everything is cooling down, very pleasant.

I hope the weather is great where you are and that your day is good...

After dealing with some major issues the past six weeks, I have finally come to terms with my BP and am again taking my meds. I feel really great. I haven't had any down in the dumps or rage issues is 2.5 weeks. I am actually thankful for my life and I haven't been able to say that for quite sometime. Can't wait to see if this lasts. Thanks to everyone for lending a friendly happy thought in my days of sadness.
Catmad1 you are far away but I can feel those rays of sunshine all the way in CO....

yay cat and monkey
glad you are having good days
goes to prove that there is light (however inconceivable it may seem on thoe dark days) at the end of the tunnel! :-)
Sine my meds have been upped to counter the placebo level of valproate i did have.....after 2 wks i have had the first stable(ish) wkend in months....i am sleeping and functioning and able to get up in the morning.....also dealing with "family" issues in a calm way......
not holding my breath as such is the way with bp but it gives me hope that i may be on the road to recovery :-)
Yaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It makes me sad to see that this new celebrations section has little to no attention. We can't all be having the worst day of our lives.... I wanted to say that I can't believe it, but I have made an entire week without feeling like a piece of crap and I have been motivated to do things again. I painted last night, one of my hobbies that I haven't participated in for about 10 years. I have been getting out of my funk and into things that make me happy.... I am so thankful for these days, I don't want them to ever end because I know what is on the other side.... I know in time I will swing the other way but it has been ages since I felt this good.... Yey me!!!!

I am feeling pretty good also lately. im not sure why though. Since seeing my Dr. and being diagnosed with severe PMS i havnt had an outburst/meltdown/depressed.. i had to stop the prozac he gave me because of the side-effects, i did also stop the Deplin(medical food) that the Dr gave me, but started taking it 2 days ago , so not sure what really has changed. but im holding my breath though seeing this week is my period. (which is usally when i feel im REALLY losing it) im trying not to think about what and when "it" might happen. ..... im crossing my fingers!

glad to hear others are doing well too! gives me and others hope! :-)

All I have to say is YEY. I can't believe it, I have been on a good high feeling for two weeks now? I haven't felt this good since probably high school days... that was nearly 15 years ago. It is truely amazing to me. I want to run, shout and have fun. with my bp II, I have had the depression completely and the anger and irritation, but maybe 1 time since high school have I felt this good and it was for 1 day last year. I ended up spending a whole boat load of money for no reason but I loved it. I am taming myself and not going shopping this time- even though I WANT TO SO BADLY. Just feeling this great makes the world seem a totally different experience. HAPPY DAYS TO EVERYONE!!

I'm glad for you, Monkey mist
wish you could send me some happiness!
But im not as low as i was so thats something to be thankful for....one thing that watching you post has taught me is to look on the bright side ....so thanx for that :-)

It's very important for me to recognize when I've had a success.....I was extremely manic earlier today & was able of my own volition to use my treatment plan & support system to alleviate what surely would have been a full blown episode.....I didn't even realize I was 'til after 1pm....I was anxious, irritable, discontented w/things & my thoughts were racing like mad....I felt like poking my brain with Q-TIPS to try & shut it up....However for no one else being around that's an improvement....Normally I would freak out & try to find whatever substance (or something or someone) to self medicate with which rarely worked w/out me ending up sitting in a jail, institution or hospital!....I was diagnosed 5mos ago w/BP1....@ 1st depakote made me feel like I was trapped in a box....I also thought it was a blow to my pride but found later that I wasn't OK w/the thought of having no more manic episodes....Now I don't know how I could've ever thought way....I'm extremely grateful to UNI & Cirque Lodge & Wasatch Mental Health now....I obviously still have trouble with sleep & I've got ADHD as well especially when it comes to reading so I'm hoping to get some suggestions in that area before I see my P Doc Jun 1st...This is my 3rd shot @ trying to post a reply so I'm going to give up while I'm ahead....I'm not very internet savvy & I don't want to lose this much shorter entry but maybe some1 will get something out of this besides just me.....I moved to Orem, UT were it snowed 3ins last morning when its almost June, from Berkeley, CA.....I'm having a bit of culture shock as well

Chris, yeah for you!!!! Glad that you are using the tools that you have learned to control your up swing. It just takes time to learn those things, I guess. I still haven't learned to control my downward spiral, but have been feeling great for 2.5 weeks so that is good. Good luck in UT. I know what you mean about the strange weather. I moved from Berkeley to CO.... Have a wonderful day

Pipi U rock for responding thanx a lot for your support & encouraging words!....Sorry i'm just getting back to u now I just wanted to let u knoe that sometimes it seems like i'm running around CUZ i know that the downward spiral is coming.....like a time bomb!!!...Its inevitable....Being depressed for 2mos in a row is what drove my family to intervene on my life & get me out here to UT!.....Thank You again

good for you chris - i too have been trying to control my ups and downs as well - any chance of some tips (here in the uk they arent very good a t giving practical tips ....just meds!) :-)

hi chris, hope you are still doing well. I had a little stumble but thanks to my meds, at least I think so (finally got a good combo), I am right back up again. I am not as excited as I was a couple of weeks ago but I don't hate everything life has to offer right now.
Storm you might want to try writting in a personal journal whenever you get the chance. I write in my journal, even if it's a few sentences every so often throughout the day. It gives my mind a chance to put the maddness on a page and I sort of leave it there. I know when I write, I feel less anxious and able to accept things around me.

hi pipi
thanks for the suggestion. i have tried writing my "memoirs" lol while in a state and it is cathartic - a bit scary when i read it back though to be honest! the trouble i have is i am very mistrustful of people respecting my privacy and seeing my innermost thoughts.....i have tried drawing got a little book and used that to sketch but again my thoughts are often soo dark that the drawings are too and i dont particularly want anyone to come across them......
i was after perhaps more physical practical things i could do - you know what i mean? maybe there isnt anything....but hey! thanks a lot anyway :-)

hi storm, I totally know what you mean about the possibility of someone reading your thoughts. I used to worry about that a lot, but i figuered they would probably never tell me that they read it so I would never know and as long as I didn't know then it couldn't hurt me. One thing that I do is write at work and when I am finished I toss my little log into the shredder. That way no one can see it and I can't go backwards (like you describe) and read about it later. I have some pretty morbid writings in my journals at home. Besides writing, I guess I don't really have much other than self medicate, not really a good option. Hope you find something that works for you. Have a great day.

i luuuuuuuuurve the shredder idea!!!!!!!!! maybe i should get a shredder at home lol! i do tend to self medicate as you prob have noticed on some of the other posts but am trying not to ......i have kicked booze into touch (which was a relief as i dont actually like being drunk but got awfully dependent on it for a while) and dont really do much else apart from weed and speed occasionally but speed i have noticed is having a nastier impact on me than before so thats next on my list to go!!!!!!!!!!!!
have a great day too :-)

Hi pipi, Hi storm

I too write in a journal (almost) everyday & here on mood tracker i usually enter a mood journal entry (mje's) cause i've not been able to level out totally.....Just about everyday is another day w/a mixed mood.....Someone reminded me how important it is to stick to the same schedule of going to sleep @ the same time & taking my meds @ the same time everyday.....It's such a boring thing having a regimen BUT i know i have way less mood swings when I follow 1....Lately i've been very good w/doing what i'm supposed to just haven't been consistent w/the timing & its definitely affecting me...ALSO...I was living on a pot farm over the past summer smoking all different kinds of weed & hash.....i thought it was the answer to what ailed me turns out it made me hypomanic....I also had access to all the shrooms & MDMA i wanted; was willing to try anything to make me feel better cept sticking a needle in my arm....I didn't know what was wrong w/me SO now i've committed to laying off of everything for a year & honestly giving the doctors a chance BCAUSE what i was doing ended up making me extremely depressed & I do remember when life was worth living!

Hi everyone... have not looked in here for a bit and it is great to see that others are having good days.

I had a bumpy road there for a few weeks and I am happy to say I am now on the rise.. it is good because I thought the meds would stop all ups.. lets just hope it does not go too high and all will be right..

Well, it's great to know I'm in good company. I've managed to stay on even keel for 2 1/2" months now which is a first in over 2 years. It's been exactely a year since I had ECT and when I look back I am so grateful that I have managed to make good progress. There have been some scary moments inbetween but fortunately the downs have been sporadic and few. My meds have kept the high completely at bay. Although the meds have succeeded in controlling the mood swings, it has been at a cost. The toll the side effects have taken on my body has been a difficult pill to swallow (excuse the pun) and I am still grappling with this. But for now I'll be grateful for where I am today.

Well my days have gotten better to the most. Had to go back to meds that didn't make me feel so useless.I guess as with everything its trial and error. It is true we seem to post more when we are having bad days then when things are going well. I think that's just part of life though. I am glad that things are going well and I am being reminded that I should recognize that also. Thanks for starting this thread

I know it's all of a sudden but I think my meds have finally leveled me out I shoulda had a really bad day given some circumstances but I was even keel the whole time- well I was a tiny bit irritated....If only I could do something about the weight gain!...I dont wanna get my hopes up too fast....BUT I'm stoked right now & NOT manic; its very weird feeling

Just wanted to say that I've had a good (dare I say "normal"?) few days. First time in a long time. :-) I'm scared to trust it, but maybe the meds are finally kicking in. I'm hoping I'm not jinxing myself by writing this, but am excited that I might finally be starting to get better.

Yey, I am still on a rolling path right now. I can't believe it, I went out for a walk and a run with my husband and dogs this weekend and even went to the movies. I haven't felt like doing any of those things in a long time and especially in the same weekend. I usually get very anxious about getting out, not sure why. I just start to think about everything and if I will have to see people or talk to them. I hate to order food in a restraunt because I don't want to talk to the server, kinda strange I know. I still felt that way this weekend but I pushed myself and had a really good time. I am thankful for each day that I have a good day. Hope you are all well.

I have been feeling more like myself since taking Deplin. i have been struggling for 1 1/2 yrs of feeling so horrible all of the time, im amazed. i too keep wondering if and when those feeling will return. but so far so good. and i made it through one menstrual period with out any "meltdowns" (as i call them)!!
i thought i'd never feel good again.
its great to hear others are doing better!

I'm excited because this week has been the most "baseline" week since depakote, seraquel & therapy - still gotta do something about the weight gain 40lbs

Thanx for helping everyone!

well, it has been a long time coming!!! I finally have a victorious day over my school studies. I have been having panic attacks and freak out fests for the past five weeks because of my classes and in human anatomy lab practical today I recieved a 93%... I am so happy I want to run and tell the world. Of coarse a few kolonipin (sp) helped me through my day and my two exams but hey if that's what it takes for my success then I will take it!!!! I want to share this with all of you because we don't often have great moments like this... At least I don't. Have a great day all

hey pipi!!!!!
WELL DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know how rough it is trying to balance studies and bp - i am in my last yr of my neuroscience phd in med school.....
what are you doing?
well done on the anatomy results - go girl!!!!!!
:-)
:-)
:-)

Hey storm, glad to see you again and thanks for the happy thoughts. I am pretty excited to see that you are going to med school, maybe you can set me up with some tips. I am going for my RN, I want to be a psychiatric nurse (go figure :-) I am really excited though, AGAIN because I just took my online mid term and received a B. Not to shabby, I guess positive thinking really does work.
I am also very excited because I just received an email that said I am considered an alternate to start the program in the Spring of 2011- I hope I get it because I wasn't set to start until Fall 2011, that would mean I can quit my crappy job and start doing something that I really enjoy. I am pretty reved up right now! I feel like I could run a marathon, but I won't, I think I will just clean my house.
Anyway, Good luck with your phd- that is awesome and very difficult I am sure. If you have advise for me with studying I will gladly accept it :) Happy smiles and bright days, talk to you soon

hey pipi hun :-)
go for it sweets! us nutcases (lol felt affectionately obviously) tend to gravitate toward these type of careers, weirdly enough! My first degree was psychology and I am looking at the genetic basis of a neurological disorder in the neuroscience and psychiatry dept of med school....hahaha! (strangely though i have met more discrimination against my mental health "issues" here than in any other walk of life so just watch your back hun...)
what sort of tips you after hun? though i hasten to add that i should be getting some from you not the other way round cos ive only just kinda got me head together (and its me last 6 mths!!!!!!)and with the amazing grades you are getting - you could give me a few top tips :-)
sending you lotsa luck - really hope you get on the program in spring :-)
happy smiles to you too!!!!!
Storm x

Hi Storm, well things are still going alright for me. I was wondering how you study. I just feel like whatever I try doesn't really do a great job. One problem that I have is that I have this social phobia and I just don't want to talk to anyone that I don't know, more or less put myself out there to ask for their help. It seems that this forum is the only place where I feel safe enough to talk about my feelings and really reach out for support. I just don't like getting together with people in my classes because I feel like an awkward clod. I wanted to know if you make flash cards, write things down, have someone quiz you or any study tips that you can offer. Right now I am into writing everything down about three times and flashcards and such, but when I get to the exam I completely freak out and think that I can't remember what is going on. I must say that I was able to calm myself for the last couple of tests and it proved to be successful but I have a whole lot of material to learn in the next four weeks and I wonder what I could be doing better.
I know what you mean about the discrimination aspect. I dreaded telling my boss at work, thankfully he is very understanding. I think if it were any other supervisor he definatly would have a thought that I can't handle situations. The reason that I had to tell him is because of this moron at work. You might have read one of my other posts about this idiot, rant on the forum. I just can't stand him and it was affecting the way that everyone was perceiving my actions and I wasn't "staying with in the respect values". Can't give respect to someone who is totally incompetant. Anyway, that isn't what this post is for... long tangent... but I want to say thanks and let me know what you think about the studying methods and how they work for you. Have a great night... think happy thoughts!
pipi