teen not understanding bipolar...needs help

i have bipolar but dont understand much. i feel things and have wierd emotions and dont know if there from the bipolar or im just having these teen feelings. and plus im going through a really rough time at home rite now and its not helping and i dont have people like me to talk to. HELP!

hey... I was dx with bipolar when I was 15, and no one even told me. I didn't know what was going on and I didn't understand what was happening to me. So I understand where you're coming from. I can talk to you, well, through the message boards anyway...so what is going on?

well life and getting dx with bipolar and this family crap and haha im 15. well my family dont understand whats happening soo it makes it harder. cuz i dont even know but they dont help there not even trying to understand and school is soooo hard with this.. what did you do?

You don't want to do what I did. I also had a family that didn't understand, had a brother who told me I should have just killed myself, had parents who threw my medications away before I got a real chance to take them and do better. My sophomore year of high school was a total loss due to hospitalizations, crises, etc.

My best advice is to listen to your doctor, ask a LOT of questions so you understand what is going on with you. Just because you're young doesn't mean you don't deserve to understand. I also had a couple of friends I leaned on and a good therapist who helped. I don't know why my parents let me stay in that intensive outpatient treatment facility for 6 months (after school everyday when I was not in patient) but they did.

If you don't have a therapist, maybe you have a church or synagogue pastor or rabbi, or youth group organizer you could talk to?

Also, it is really hard fro parents because they feel responsible for "making" you "crazy" int he head. They won't say it, but I bet they feel guilty. I found out years later that my mother was extremely guilty. And my parents then took it out on me. And I reacted by acting out in really bad ways which you do NOT want to do. You can get through this to a stable place, trust me on that.

I went through so much and it isn't that I don't still have some problems, i do, but I am not suicidal any more, and I have been fairly stable on medication for a long time. I even gradyuated from law school in the top of my class and have a great job at the US Dept of Justice in DC. You CAN acieve your goals still, you have to always have your dreams and goals, never let go of them.

My daughter is 15, YIKES am I feeling old, but anyway, I always tell her to keep hold of her dreams.

Also, have you talked to your high school guidance counselor? Sometimes they can intervene and talk to families. Maybe yours can talk to your parents for you? That woudl be a good idea I think. Sometimes it is easier for parents to listen to an adult (unfortunately), especially one with the right background. And having bipolar yourself you may not be feeling the most coherent you have eevr been in yourlife and it may be hard for you to explain so they willunderstand.

But knw that the majority of people will NOT completely understand unless they have the illness themselves. I can remember what 15 was like forme and it was bleak. Ages 15-16 especially. But as bleak as it was, I did live through it and I think if I could do it then anyone can. I don't want to get into how low I got (unless you seriously want to know) but I got really rock bottom, and I hope you can avoid that.

A lot is out of your control, but some things are still in your control and you need to do the best you can to hang onto what control you have.

Also, I took a short schedule at school my sophomore year and got off school early. Maybe you coudl take a shorter schedule andmake it up next year when you are more stable. I ended up taking night school for two classes in my senior year but I was much more prepared to handle it by then.

I wish I coudl reach out and fix it all for you because it hits home and I know it must be terribly difficult for you...

Hi Candace
I don't mean to intrude on the conversation you are both having but I thought I could offer a little help.
There is a lot of information out there for you to learn from just be careful. I tried researching Bipolar on the internet and ended up so confused I wanted to pull my hair out.
I have recently been told of a book called Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide. It really helped me as well as my husband understand what bipolar disorder is and how I can live well with it. Some times you can get an older version and the meds aren't up to date so watch out for that. It can be found on Amazon.com or at any large book store.
Also make lists of questions you come up with before you see your PDOC. Things like...What kind of bipolar disorder do I have?...What are the meds you're giving me doing? Are the anti depressives or stabilizers?...What things should I avoid to minimize the chances of my mania or depression symptoms coming back?.. What should I do if I feel a depression/mania attack coming on?... And stuff like that.
I also find that just reading through the various entries on this forum have taught me a lot.
There are many very kind and knowledgeable people here.
I know they are helping me a lot.
Be well.

Candace
I am new to this site from my doctor, but not new to this disease or its effects
I showed my first signs of this disease at 9 and wasn't accurately diagnosed until I was 28 years old. My family didn't understand, people at school didn't understand, medical professionals didn't understand, and I thought I was out of my gourd.

Now, I find best thing I can do is find others with disease that understand how I feel and not keep it bottled up. I go to AA meetings and talk with people there, there are also a lot Bipolar support groups that you can find online that can help you connect with other people with this condition and give you a connection when you have a need to reach out.

And take your meds. The worst thing I ever did was go off my meds one extended period and my wife and kids saw it well before I did.

Hi Candace,

I've had mood disorder symptoms since I was a toddler. My first memory is of contemplating suicide at about 3. I always knew I was "different" but didn't begin to understand why until about age 30. 13-21 were difficult years for me and I let my impulses get me into lifelong problems. (I married a toxic person). I hope you take full advantage of charting moods and sharing your experience with those here who do understand what you're going through. We older ones hope that our experiences can make the journey a little less scary for you younger ones.

K

omg! i'm totally where you are. i am also a teenager and thankfully i have a bipolar mom who understands. i know its hard on her but she does the best she can. I also have a really hard time with school and friends. supposedly these are the years where we "learn how to form relationships", blah, blah, blah. So being bipolar pretty much makes almost everything difficult. I know my bipolar affects my school work and friends. They know im bipolar but they DO NOT understand. they think its just really bad "mood swings". One day im really manic ( they love me like that) and the next im so depressed im suicidal and they're lost. they cant even begin to understand! i don't blame them though. Its really important you understand whats going on inside you so any time you have a question about whats happening to you, you should call your doctor or therapist. Ive been told its a better if they catch the disease as early as possible because the longer your brain chemistry is not normal, the harder it is to change. The younger they catch it, the better it is when your older. My advice to you is to talk, talk, talk A LOT to people who understand. Journaling helps a lot too. there are a lot of things that bipolar affects and a lot of things we need to change. I would love to talk to you and maybe i could help if you'd like. feel free to contact me.