Hi Ya, Mooky! You know, you have a really great question here. It is excellent that you trying to process the difference between your biological responses (your mood) and your psychological responses (you emotions). In our culture, we use the words mood and emotions interchangeably. In understanding our disorders (either bipolar or depression) we have to understand them separately.
Here's a great quote that I found from a author who is well-known behavioral scientist. His name is Paul Eckman. He does a lot of the "face" stuff... reading people by reading their faces.
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This is a good place to distinguish emotions from moods. All of us have both of them, but they are different, even though both involve feelings. The obvious difference is that emotions are much shorter than moods. Moods can last a whole day, sometimes two days, while emotions can come and go in minutes, sometimes seconds. …
A mood activates specific emotions. When we are irritable, we are seeking an opportunity to become angry; we interpret the world in a way that permits, or even requires, us to become angry. …
Another way moods differ from emotions is that once an emotion has begun and we have become aware of it, we can usually point to the event that caused it. Rarely do we know why we are in a mood. It just seems to happen to us. …
Earlier I argued that emotions are necessary for our lives, and we wouldn't want to be rid of them. I am far less convinced that moods are of any use to us. … Moods narrow our alternatives, distort our thinking, and make it more difficult for us to control what we do, and usually for no reason that makes any sense to us. … If I could, I would forgo ever having any mood again and just live with my emotions. I would gladly give up euphoric moods to be rid of irritable and blue moods. But none of us have that choice.
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I completely agree with Dr. Eckman. My mood STRONGLY influences my emotions. My mood often dictates how I will respond to a certain situation. I work in a very high stress job with a great deal of responsibility. When my mood is stable, I roll with the punches, take things as they come, and don't let people/circumstances rattle me. When my mood is disturbed, I am grumpy, irritable, easily angered or offended, or easily frightened. I want to stay in bed (or go home and go back to bed), shut my office door and tell my staff to stay away (but I don't), and curl up in a little ball. Those are things that don't even cross my mind when my mood is stable.
As for the idea of rapid mood cycles... even when I am deeply depressed, I can be "distracted" from my depression by a friend or an event. I can surprise myself to find myself smiling and laughing, even though I KNOW I'm depressed. This isn't mood cycling, this is simply a respite.... a moment of peace that the disease sometimes gives us.
For example, I absolutely LOVE public speaking. I do it regularly. The bigger the audience the better. If I am depressed, it may be extremely difficult for me to prepare to the event, to get dressed and organized for the event... even to show up for the event. But, once I am "on stage" and doing my thing, it is very hard for me not to be distracted from my depression for those minutes or hours that I am in front of people. I smile, I laugh, I tell jokes, and I engage in witty banter with my audience all the while getting my very important message across. This doesn't mean that my depression is gone... for just as surely as I have to walk off the stage, the cloak... the dark cloud, will envelope me again, and it comes back pretty quickly. That doesn't make me a rapid cycler.
I hope this helps a little bit. Again, it is an excellent question.
Be well,
Jules
Joined: 01-27-2009